Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Will someone please bless my heart?

Last night was the 2nd or 3rd night I spent several hours trying to get one of at least 12 templates to work on this here blog.


Nothing worked.


As I speak, I am in my 6th hour of editing, listing and uploading pictures of new lovelies into my etsy shop. Our internet is ssss....lllll....oooo.....wwww and I am looooosing it. I feel my nerves slowly unraveling like a sweater.

Sometimes (a lot of times) when I'm frazzled like this, my good friend will say "oh. bless your heart" (cause she's a good southern girl) and I'll say, "yes! please bless it because, by golly, SOMEBODY needs to bless it!"

That little phrase has so many meanings to us southern folks, but, for me, it pretty much falls into 2 categories:

1. It can be a cover up for a slam (because we can't bear to hear our true thoughts out loud) like, "bless her heart, she's.... uglier than a mud fence....unfortunately dressed....losing her ever lovin mind, etc."


2. It can be sympathetic like when my friend and I see a poor woman wrestling with her kids in the middle of the mall, " that woman needs a LARGE glass of wine, bless her heart."

And I am deeply convinced that my friendly southern neighbors and bystanders (and probably yours too) have indeed uttered this same phrase on my behalf many, many times before and you know what? I welcome it! Yes! Please bless my heart! It needs to be blessed. In fact, I'm asking you to.

Because right now I am wearing a brown dress shirt with navy blue sweat pants (sexy), my kitchen table is absolutely COVERED in branches, leaves and necklaces from my business (story on that later), my kid's bathroom is growing all kinds of interesting science projects (not on purpose), I haven't bought new underwear in years and IT SHOWS, my hair has been in the same knot for a couple of days now, I'm being forced to listen to Frog and Toad sing with Mexican accents and I'm pretty sure my 2 year old just told me to sit in the trash can because I'm yucky.

And my kids? Did you see how they were dressed today? Their dire need for hair cuts? Did you know that they have eaten a box of crackers for dinner tonight because I'm too tired to get off my tail? Oh! And one of them plays with his nipple incessantly and I CANNOT GET HIM TO STOP.

So, while you're at it....bless their hearts too.

And my beautiful, hard-working, well dressed husband gets to come home to us, bless his heart.

For all of the above reasons and MANY, MANY MORE, I am delighted to tell you that from here on out, our little corner of the blogosphere will be called....

"Well, Bless Their Hearts"

I'm also pleased to tell you that the majority of you voted for it! You guys are so stinkin smart! I loved seeing what you guys voted for, and since no one voted for "rode hard and put up wet" I feel the need to tell you that the real meaning refers to a horse. I will say no more. :)

I ran across this further explanation on my favorite southern saying and so I will leave you with it. But before I go, know that if you've lived in the south for any extended period of time, and you have gone out in public, chances are your heart has been generously blessed. Embrace it.

And please come back so, in the middle of it all, we can continue to bless each other's hearts as well. :)

"Like I said earlier, I used to think that everybody knew what "bless your heart" meant, and it wasn't until a friend of mine from out West started complaining about it that I realized that the term could be confusing to foreigners. So, here are a few simple definitions you can use the next time a Yankee or Westerner starts carrying on about the way we talk.
  1. "Bless your heart" is a form of empathy. It's like giving someone a great, big hug. When a friend starts complaining about her rotten boss, her no count husband, and how the kids are driving her crazy, we just shake our heads and look her in the eye and give her a heartfelt "bless your heart." It's our way of saying "Honey, I'm so sorry. I know just how you feel, and I'm glad that today it's you and not me."
  2. When your cousin Susie does something just plain dumb, and your aunt Margaret calls you up to tell you about it, you just listen real close and utter a few "bless her hearts" when she pauses long enough to draw in a breath. That way you'll both know that even though Susie doesn't have enough sense to blow up a pea, she's still family after all, and we love her anyway.
  3. In the South, we believe in being polite even if it kills us. So, when we just can't fight the urge to say something nasty, we follow it up with a "bless her heart" just to make us feel better. "Look at that poor woman trying to jog around that track. Her rear-end is dragging a trail, bless her heart."
  4. Probably the most important way we use "bless your heart" is so we can identify each other. When I'm far from home and feeling all alone, I just throw out a few "bless your hearts" into the conversation and see what happens. If the person I'm talking to gets this confused look like I've just sprouted another head , then I just go on to the next person and do the same thing until finally I hear that familiar twang that's sweeter than a melody and then come those beautiful words "Well, bless your heart." That's when I know I'm home-- even though I'm a thousand miles away."

  5. (by Sandra Poole and Jennifer Youngblood)


Lindsay said...

Since I am as southern as they come:) I love the blog name!
And Bless your Heart, that is a mess you are in over there:)

Martha said...

My Texas-born and raised boss told me that one of the definitions of "Bless your heart" was "You poor little idiot." I still can't help but chuckle to myself whenever I hear it!