Thursday, May 08, 2008

The Very Bad, Awful Date

It started yesterday even before we left the house. We had a frustrating conversation and misunderstood each other leading to us trying to work it out in the car as we drove to Charlotte to drop Isaiah off at a friend's house. We have been wanting to go walk down Union Street in Concord to see some new little shops and hang outs so we headed back to Concord. We stopped at the McDonald's drive through for a quick dinner, ate it in the car and then got out to go walk around and hopfully duck into a cute little coffee shop for awhile. It was 7:30 and almost EVERYthing was closed. Ugh.

We walked up the street, threw our trash away and got back in the car. Now what? It was still tense between us with little talking. Josh had asked me to read an article awhile back so we could talk about it and I hadn't. He even sent an email with the article asking if we could talk about it on our date. I didn't even open the email.

We settled on driving back to Charlotte and going to Dilworth coffee (right down the street from where we dropped off Isaiah). I was literally falling asleep in the car, then complaining to Josh about how much I often dislike our dates because things go wrong, I don't know how to fix them, I don't know what to say, I don't know what he expects and I struggle to even stay awake through it all. Nice, right?

We get to the coffee place, get our coffee and sit down. Josh pulls up the article to just give me an overall idea of what it was about so we can discuss it. Things are ever so slightly improving as I'm listening and trying to hard to think through what he's reading so I can give feedback. We are sitting there about 10 mins max when a guy who works there comes up to tell us that they will be closing in about a minute. I was DONE.

Josh gave me one look and started to ask what we should do, and I immediately shot him down with "I do NOT want to go to a third location!" It was over. We picked up Isaiah early and went home in silence. Once we got home, Josh went for a drive to pray off our date, I guess.

When he came to bed he sweetly said that though it wasn't a good time to discuss it, he had been praying about his part in the whole thing and he was sorry. We would talk about it later and that he loved me. I said the same thing and we fell asleep in our normal cuddly fashion.

So help. Has this happened to you? I feel like we have dates like this a lot. I'm starting to wonder if it's just an all out spiritual attack. Insight? What would you do?


Shawnda said...

Oh sister. Somehow I knew this last night. My heart was heavy for you last night. I would love to talk with you about it all. love you much.

Scotty and Lisa said...

Yes, we've been there too. Although I don't have a good answer for you, I know when this happens to us, it is usually because I have expectations for this date to make up for all the lack of communication, closeness, intimacy, etc... that has been happening over the course of the week. So, if it doesn't turn out to be AMAZING, I am disappointed and frustrated. Maybe the key for us is working more on those things on non-date days and changing my expectations.