My Journey to Simpler: family purpose statement

Simplicity has been a theme everywhere lately, and my brain is no exception. Here's why...

--In April, we will have 5 people living in a small house (1100 sq ft).

--We would like to move eventually, but that requires us to pay off debt and save for a down payment.

--I would love to not freak out at 5pm over what we're going to have for dinner.

--I want to stock our freezer with meals for nights when I don't want to cook and for when baby Zoe gets here.

--I want to read more.

--I want to have more people over and build deeper relationships.

--I don't want to get completely overwhelmed by the messes that are made in this house.

--I don't want things in our house that we don't love and/or are not useful to us.

--I want to have some idea of what the day will look like when my feet hit the floor.

--I want to be available for last minute play dates and people dropping by without losing my mind over what our house looks like.

--I want to engage with my kids more.

--I want to be available to meet needs around me.

--Bottom line, I want to be more intentional with this life.

So, I'm reading this book right now from Simple Mom's Tsh Oxenreider:

I wrote a little blurb about it here, and it has been really helpful to me. I'm not one to follow people's instructions (read: slightly rebellious), but I am really trying to do everything she suggests in the book so I can get the full experience.

One of the first things she talks about is drafting a family purpose statement. Honestly, that sounded a little hokey (and intimidating) to me, but as she explained that it is the measuring stick by which you will measure many little daily decisions and, therefore, live more intentionally, I was listening.

Though it felt uncomfortable and completely out of character, it made sense to me. Being able to ask the question "does this line up with what we believe our family is called to?" sounds really freeing and a great way to make decisions a little easier.

{from here}

It should be simple, timeless and general, but not too general. You want to be able to put real feet to it. She lists a ton of thought-provoking questions to ask yourself to help you narrow your purpose statement down so I answered them. Questions like,

--What are a few strengths of each member of our family?

--What are the top four priorities we want our family to value?

--If our home could be filled with one emotion, what would that emotion be?

Then she suggests that you have your husband (if you're married) answer the same questions and then come up with a statement together.

This is where we stalled out. I haven't given him the questions to answer yet, but she did give a few examples from her book of her's and other people's statements:

"As a family, we want to glorify God in all we say, do and are.

We will...

-Put each other first.

-Cultivate deep relationships with one another.

-Extend love to those around us.

-Live Simply.

-Be true to who God made us.

-Take care of our health.

-Be good stewards of creation.

-Be lifelong learners."

"To be focused on peace."

{from here}

So we're gonna try it (and I'll be sure to come back and share it with you!). I don't know how exactly it will end up serving us and I'm sure we will change it and tweak as we go, but I'm optimistic. :)

{from here}

Have you ever done this? Has it helped you? Does this sound completely crazy?

Thoughts from a Non Planner

I'm not a natural planner. I don't thrive on meal plans, schedules and charts. My closets aren't arranged by color, I don't know what we'll be eating for dinner in May and my toiletries are all thrown together in one basket (not that those things are bad).

My personality falls much more on the creative, free spirited, spontaneous side. I (typically) don't like rules and I don't like to be told what to do. I thrive on creating. I like to rethink things and come up with my own way to do them. I hate reading the instructions. I'd rather figure things out myself (which, yes, is sometimes disastrous). People will trump a plan any day....which is why I missed a lot of music theory classes in college. I love ideas to be outside-the-box, fresh, new, colorful, different. I like having freedom in my day, and the friends we see the most are the ones that text in the morning and ask us if we want to hang out for dinner that night.

I'm am so much more aware of this right now because this is the time of year that we are all inundated with a better way to meal plan, organize our closets, chart our chores, come up with new systems, get on a schedule, exercise with a better plan, etc.

It's everywhere.

And in this season of "do better, be better," it's SO easy to just feel like you're not enough. Like you have such a long way to go. Like the world would rather you do things differently than the way you already do them. Be different than what you are. It fits them better. I'm am convinced that we live in a planner's world.

"When you fail to plan, you plan to fail."

Having said that, I really do acknowledge that there is much value in planning and being able to best serve your family and those around you.

She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast
for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it,
then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden.
First thing in the morning, she dresses for work,
rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
She senses the worth of her work,
is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth,
diligent in homemaking.

(Proverbs 31)

I'll be honest, sometimes I don't like the Proverbs 31 woman....or maybe I just don't like the way we have represented her. Whatever it is, she's a hard worker, she serves others well, her family is blessed and her Father smiles. And that....is the reason I try to plan and organize. That...is the reason I'm working hard to get meals in my freezer, reduce our clutter, make our home more manageable and peaceful. It's certainly not because I just like it or thrive off of it. And slowly (very slowly), I'm learning to be ok with that about myself.

Some of my dearest friends are great planners and I appreciate this about them. They offer a different perspective and can be so helpful to me, but if you're more like me, I just want to offer a little encouragement... He loves you.

In fact, He delights in you. He rejoices over you. He sings over you. He calls you "Beautiful" and "His." He can't wait to wrap His arms around you and have you home.

And this is your reality right now; for how you are in this moment. Not the "new improved" you that may or may not emerge sometime in 2012. He gave you a voice. He gave you something to say, to contribute, that He didn't give anyone else. He didn't make two of you. You are worth more than diamonds.

This beautiful truth is for all His children, but I feel Him specifically reminding me of it right now when I don't measure up (often), when I struggle with just getting dinner on the table, when I haven't done a good job with my laundry, I've spent more money than I should have and I've wasted too much time on facebook.

We don't have to be put together to be His. He's promised to help us and hold our hand. How freeing!

And this is what I hear Him whispering as I struggle to grow in my gaping areas of weakness.

Chin up, non planners!

Smile kids, we're giving away your toys!

Well, we got a good start. At first, I sat in the middle of the floor and just kinda stared at everything. I hadn't really thought through how I would do this. So I started where I pretty much always start....we threw everything in the middle of the floor.

I began sorting the toys into bins based on category. Toy Story toys, monster trucks/cars, duplex blocks, outdoor toys, dress up stuff, farm toys, tools/construction toys, toys too big for a bin, stuff we didn't know what to do with, etc... Oh, and I had a big trash bag handy that I managed to completely fill without the boys ever really seeing what I was doing. Thankfully, they never asked about it either.

Once everything was categorized we went into the living room and unloaded the big truck that was also filled with toys. THEN, we finally went through each category and I would tell the boys how many they could keep and the rest went into our giveaway bin.

I was really, really proud of the boys. We didn't have one fight about it. Once we got started, no one cried and they actually were really cheerful about giving their toys away to kids that may not have any. {I should throw in at this point that they have had a huge collection of GeoTrax in storage for awhile so this purge was, for them, mainly motivated by wanting to bring the GeoTrax back down.}

This is our first bin....

I will also say that it was somewhat hard for me to see all those toys go in the bin. I'm SO excited to see less in our house and to give to other families. I'm also passionate about teaching our kids to think for others and to have generous, giving hearts.....and that toys and possessions are not what satisfy us.

But... after seeing so many brand new toys (many that Josh and I bought them for our Disney trip this past summer) get tossed in the bin, I had to remind myself a few times why we were doing this.

This is where we ended up after several hours of work. Don't let the angle fool you...the basket and bin both hold a lot of stuff and the trash bag is full of stuffed animals. Whew!

We still have a little more to go and then we start on mine and Josh's room!

Now we just need to get these toys out of that spot by the door and into the hands of some folks who could use them. I'd call that a purging success. :)

If you've donated to families in need, I'd love to hear where! I'm looking for some good places to take this stuff so please... do tell!

My cheap and easy Christmas decor

Ok, I just wanted to share a few really simple ways I've decorated for Christmas this year. How my home feels really effects me. I have to pull in the reins on myself all the time because I LOVE home decor projects and if I were to ever open another etsy shop, it would definitely be full of fun decor items that I repurposed, brought back to life, etc.

Having said that, you know my goal this year is simple and to spend less so here is what I came up with.

1. Epson salt "snow"...

I got this idea from one of my favorite bloggers, Melissa, from The Inspired Room. My pictures don't pick it up well, but I love how the salts shimmer in the candle light like real snow. It adds such warmth and soft glow to our living room. And I love anything in a mason jar! :)

{Epson salt was ~$2.50 for a 1/2 gal carton at Target and filled at least 10 jars. I already had the candles and jars.}

2. Work with what you have...

We put up maybe a third of our ornaments this year so I found these cuties in a box and stuck them on top of candle holders I already had. I love how they glimmer in the candle light.

{free!}

3. Plant in galvanized tub...

I will be the first to admit that I'm not the biggest poinsettia fan. I think they're overdone and I get really turned off by the shiny green and red paper their pots come wrapped in. But... I had picked up this little silver planter at Ikea for about $2 for an amaryllis bulb that I was growing. When that thing bloomed it was gorgeous and after the blooms died I just had to have some kind of colorful plant in it's place.

{Poinsettia plant - $3.47 at Walmart; metal planter - $2 at Ikea}

4. 3 tiered pie tin stand with leftover ornaments...

I made the stand with dollar store pie plates and glass candle holders to use as a craft fair display for my shop so I just pulled that out of the closet and filled it with silver, red and tiny green ornaments. I felt like the top needed something so I just plopped in a pillar candle I already had on hand.

{free since I already had everything, but the entire thing would have cost me less than $10.}

5. Old Christmas card collage...

I have saved Christmas cards for several years waiting for a project to come along. Finally, last night I just couldn't wait anymore so I took some of the cards and taped them together in a collage. (I think even if you didn't have Christmas cards on hand you could just use cute wrapping paper.) Then I printed off the words "comfort" and "joy" in a font and size I liked, cut them out and glued them on the collages. I stuck them in the floating glass frames we already have above our couch. I chose a harder font to cut out so that part was time consuming but I like how they turned out and I spent NOTHING. :)

{free!}

6. Wreath...

I started with a vine wreath form from Hob Lob and some bulbs I already had.

I found this wooden letter "H" (also at Hobby Lobby) and painted it silver.

Using floral wire, I secured the "H" to one side of the wreath...

and I hot glued the bulbs to the other side...

I only lost one bulb in the process and definitely would have preferred shatter proof bulbs but this is what I had on hand. (I did pick up the little green bulbs in the $1 section at Target. They were out of silver or red so I settled for green.)

Finished product...

Please excuse the pictures as I was taking them after dark.

(It looks like someone wanted to say hi....)

{wreath - $3 with a 40% coupon from HL, wooden letter - $1.50 at HL, floral wire - $3 at HL, little green ornaments - $1 at Target}

linked with I {heart} naptime.

{linked with Works for Me Wednesday}

My (Slightly) Simpler Christmas Plan

I have been thinking about this so much lately. This idea of a meaningful, quieter and simpler Christmas is something that has eluded me and my family every year. Not that I'm complaining....we are so blessed to have both mine AND Josh's family 15 mins away (including extended family). Our boys enjoy time with their grandparents on a weekly basis and are growing up calling their cousins "best friends." I absolutely LOVE this. It's important to me and I can see how it has enriched our lives in countless ways.

Having said that :) .... one of the challenges of living so close to our families is balancing our holidays between them. Here's how it looks right now:


Thanksgiving: every year we alternate who we spend it with. This year was our year to be with Josh's family. Next year we will be with my family, etc.


Christmas Eve: we arrive at my aunt's house (all extended family on my mom's side come) around 3pm for our yearly tradition of singing, eating, my grandmother reading the Christmas story, opening presents, etc. At around 5:30 we leave and head to Josh's parents' house (30 mins away) for their tradition of Josh's mom fixing a huge dinner and all us kids and grand kids being together and opening presents with each other. This is my most favorite day of the year!


Christmas Day: as soon as we can get up, we head over to my parent's house for a wonderful breakfast and Christmas Morning Cappuccino (I'll have to post the recipe later) and then us kids and grand kids open presents with my parents. At noon we round ourselves up and go to have a big lunch with Josh's extended family. Sometimes (because the morning is so rushed) we go back to my parent's house and spend the rest of the afternoon and evening.

I'm tired from just writing that.


{Now, I'm sure you practical planners out there already have a million solutions as to how we could do this better (and I'm sure they're great!). I have thought through some big changes that would make things easier too, and we will probably have to implement them in the future (esp with a new baby coming), but for this year at least, this is what we're doing.}


So, one of my dilemma's is carving out our own family time in the midst of this craziness. The other (bigger) dilemma is having time to really reflect and celebrate JESUS (you know, the main character in the story) with the boys. The way we're doing it now, I fear, will only leave them with the impression that Christmas is when we see lots of family, eat lots of food and get LOTS of presents.


My "Miracle on Main Street" Plan:

(We live off of Main St. Get it?)

--use Christmas Eve morning to celebrate Jesus' birthday with canned cinnamon rolls and birthday candles. I love the idea of a simple breakfast everyone will love that requires no prep on my part. This plan, however, will require me to be completely ready for the next 48 hours of festivities by the time we wake up.

--implement the Jesse Tree this year which includes a daily bible reading and short devotion. I'm actually thinking of foregoing the traditional tree in favor of just having a table top Jesse Tree. (I really love how Ann did her decorations so beautifully and simply. Raffia bows with paper snowflakes and popcorn and cranberry garland. Sigh.)

--doing a major pre-Christmas purge. Since we are preparing to fit 5 people into a small house this is a necessity anyway but especially essential when I know that we will be schlepping lots of new gifts home. My plan is to attack the boys toys hard in the next few weeks and pare down to only their very favorites. I plan to donate what we don't keep. Fingers crossed there.

--plan, plan, plan ahead. Have I mentioned that my brother is getting married on December 17th and the boys and I are in it? Yeah... So, I hope to finish up ALL Christmas shopping this week, send out Christmas cards in the next couple of weeks, bake and freeze goodies.... and basically just stay as ahead of the game as I can.

Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful to look back at this season and remember more sweet moments than hectic ones? To really sink into the fact that Jesus came quietly? And that there was no endless flood of people or special deals or tons of merchandise being lugged from house to house? And that Him coming means so much more -- the difference of life and death for us?

I usually look back and am grateful that it's over. I just don't think that was what the Father had in mind for His Son's birthday.

And I really do think it's going to take a miracle to have a peaceful heart in the midst of this season (especially if my little plan doesn't work), but... given His track record... I'm pretty sure He can handle it. :)

Praying for a peaceful heart for you too, friend.

(found here)

{If you're trying for a simpler Christmas this year, I'd love to hear your suggestions}

Pinterest Project: yarn wrapped letters

In my experience, Pinterest can either be inspiring or maddening. There are SO MANY great ideas out there it's very easy to think "I could totally do that" and, before you know it, there's about 237 new projects now on your to-do list.

Enter this little project. I am always looking for very cheap, very cute decorative things to do to my house. My house and I are in a love-hate relationship and so I try to do what I can to make it cute, but on a limited budget. I'm not interested in sinking a lot of money into this house.

I bought the stuff for this several months ago....

I really liked the look of the cute letters and I wanted to add something interesting to the floating shelves in my kitchen so I bought the letters EAT and yarn at my local Hobby Lobby.

The letters are cardboard and were on sale so they were about $1.25 each. I chose a mustard yellow yarn and it was $3-4. LOVE decor that costs under $10 including tax....and I had tons of yarn left over for other projects! (I already had the glue gun and glue sticks.)

There are instructions at the link above, but they're not really all that necessary. I pretty much just started wrapping the letters in yarn and glueing here and there. It was pretty straight forward once I got the hang of it and decided how I wanted to wrap them.

The "A" was a little tricky so I sucked up my pride and looked at her instructions. :) I will say though, it was time consuming. It took me a good couple of hours to finish, but I really, really like how they turned out. :)

If you have cute decor ideas, please share!

I have another completed project and now 236 projects to be completed so I'm sure I'll be sharing about them.

Eventually.

The Thankful Tree 2011

I just realized that I posted about this very same thing last year, but I'm a year older, pregnant and don't remember anything so you'll forgive this similar post, right?

And I'm happy to say that I managed to finally get this done a full week and one day before Thanksgiving. That makes me one day ahead of where I was last year! I'll take it! :)

So, the Thankful Tree? Chances are you've heard of this before, but in case you haven't, the Thankful Tree is just a tool to help us maintain hearts of thankfulness through the Thanksgiving season. The ideal is to start at the beginning of the month. I am not the ideal, but you're reading this so.....you must be ok with that. ;)

It's a pretty simple project and great to do with kids. My boys really got into it this year. Here's how we do it:

I usually find some leaf clip art that I cut out and the boys color. When we're done, I punch a hole in the end and then tie some ribbon in the end to make a loop for hanging.

Here's where it gets fun. We sit down and I ask the boys to tell me what they're thankful for as I write each thing on the back of a leaf. I'm always hoping they'll name things like food, shelter, warmth, Jesus dying to take our sins away, etc. You know, deep, spiritual things.

This year I managed to get "myself" ..... from both boys. Oh, and Manny threw in "my head" and "my hair" (he really does have senator hair). So, while they were feeling very thankful for themselves, I prodded us to consider just a few more things they left out. We'll keep working on that.

We had already gathered some branches from outside and put them in a vase so now we hang the leaves on the tree.

The overall goal for us is to take a leaf (or a couple) each day and thank God for what we wrote on it. I put our tree in the niche with some burlap underneath and a few decorative things I had laying around and there you have it!

I'm thinking that in December I'll spray paint the branches white or silver and make it a Jesse Tree. We haven't done that before and I'm pretty excited about it. One of my favorite bloggers, Ann, tells you how to do it in her ebook here.